If You Were Going to Hire A Guy In A Bear Suit

I decided to post this story as a warning to anyone who has plans to hire a guy in a bear suit to entertain at a party this weekend:

After learning that Wally the Green Monster was booked to make an appearance elsewhere on the evening of his house warming party, our pal, Boston Dan of Somerville, MA, placed this "Bear Needed" ad on Boston Craiglist. He was in search of a person in dire need of $50 who would be willing to "show up in a bear suit with 6 pack of Labatt Blue beer, and sit down somewhere, then about 30 minutes later, leave". The "bear suit would be provided".

After receiving over 70 responses to the ad (who knew?), Dan just picked someone randomly. It turned out to be a sketchy guy, with a fake English accent. The guy did an okay job in his 30 minutes inside the bear suit, but afterwards he actually came BACK to hit on every woman at the party.

There are two lessons here: 1) Don't hire a guy off Craiglist to wear a bear suit. Get a professional. 2) Don't accept a job to impersonate the Labatt Blue bear in hope of landing a date. In the Labatt Blue commercials, the Labatt Blue Bear is smooth and he "gets the girls" but this is completely inexplicable and you are not the real Labatt Blue bear.