M - V - P

Mission Not Impossible

It's funny how the human memory can play tricks.

The 2004 Red Sox season is immortalized in our brains. We remember it only as a conglomeration of beautiful shapes and colors, a highlight reel of Big Papi's swings followed by cheering crowds and euphoric teammates jumping up and down at home plate. We remember clips from local bars as fans grasped their heads in pleasure, following that final out:

"Swing and A ground ball, stabbed by Foulke. He has it. He underhands to first. And the Boston Red Sox are World Champions!"

What we don't remember is that even last year the Sox were beaten by Ted Lilly, the starting pitching on a few occasions gave up seven earned runs in less than four innings, Millar used to pop out and ground into double plays and don't forget that sometimes the best option out of the bullpen was Curtis "where are you now" Leskanic.

The truth is that the Red Sox were completely mortal last year too. They won 98 games in 2004. In 2005, they have won 92 with four games remaining -- not a huge difference. Last year, the Yankees had already clinched the AL East at this point. This year they have the most precarious one game lead over the Sox and are heading to Fenway Friday.

In fact, the pressure is squarely on the Yankees. I mean, the Boss went out and spent $200 Million dollars on this team for the sole purpose of beating the Red Sox. A team with such a huge salary should have run away with the division within the first month of the season. The Yankees couldn't possibly CHOKE again, could they? I heard a rumor that Steinbrenner has threatened to ship the entire team out to Gilligan's Island if they don't make the playoffs.

I'd even bet a bag of marbles that Alex Rodriguez has his therapist with him on this road trip to help him with his positive thinking:

Therapist: "Look in the mirror Alex."

A-Rod: (looks in mirror)

Therapist: "You are good enough and smart enough, and gosh darn it, you are a clutch hitter."

A-Rod: "Shucks, I don't know. Who makes the MLB schedule anyway. Why do we have to play in Boston for the last three games of the season? Why can't we just keep playing the Orioles. I can hit against the Orioles. What if we lose to the Red Sox again? What if I strike out with the game on the line again? They are all going to start that talk again about how I am not a clutch hitter and how David Ortiz is the true MVP."

I'm not saying that things don't look a little bleak at the moment (okay, I admit it, I hurled a bowl of popcorn at the TV last night), but my point is that it wasn't easy last year either.

It is definitely time for some magic though. Go Sox!

The Ugliest T-Shirt in the World

As concerned as I may be that Chad Harville is now the go-to guy for the Red Sox in the ninth inning of one run games, Major League Baseball seems to have gone a step further.

Apparently this t-shirt, declaring the Yankees 2005 AL East Champions, was up for sale on MLB.com yesterday.

2 x Tuesday

Photo by Toller Scream

With the Red Sox - Jays game rained out last night, there was no choice but to watch YES Network coverage of the Yankees and Orioles.

I did my best to root for the Orioles (I even wore my orange shirt), but I have come to the grim realization that the Orioles are not going to win again this season. They have totally quit. They would have a better chance of winning if they just "shutdown" their entire roster and recruited people off the street in Baltimore.

It gets worse. Chris Snow reports that according to the Yankees, the Sox are already toast:

The Yankees, in a letter issued on or before Sept. 19, notified suite holders of 2005 postseason ticket information. The memo's opening line?

''The New York Yankees are entering the post season for the eleventh consecutive year."

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Bob Hohler of the Boston Globe reports today in his article, Painful Season Eats at Schilling, that an anonymous teammate "citing the lack of public backlash against Schilling for a subpar season" was quoted as saying: "When he comes into the game, people cheer him like he's the Pope? You think they'd let Pedro get away with this? Why does he get a free pass?"

There are two things that I want to say about this. First, this is really bad timing for an article like this to come out. I hope that it will just get swept under the rug for now even though I know that there is not much chance of that. Second, by process of elimination, the anonymous speaker had to be Keith Foulke.

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On an unrelated note, the NHL season starts in just over a week and apparently Bruins' cult hero, P.J. Stock, won't be dropping the gloves this season. Instead, he is "auditioning to be a studio sidekick for OLN's upcoming NHL broadcasts."

The Best Day Since Yesterday

Raise your hand if you left your dirty laundry for another week and found yourself swiveling on a barstool with a pint of Sam Adams in front of you at 1:35 pm Sunday, miraculously just in time for the start of the Red Sox - Orioles game.

Okay good. Almost everyone.

Raise your hand if you bought a round of shots after Manny's two run first inning 424 foot homerun.

Good.

Raise your hand if you bought another round of shots after the Sox got three more two out hits to take a 5-0 lead.

Wow. Good. Don't forget that it is only the top of the first.

Now raise your hand if you got in a fistfight with the Yankees fan cheering at the end of the bar after Robinson Frickin' Cano smacked a homerun into the bleachers to give the Yanks a 4-3 lead over the Blue Jays in the seventh inning in the Bronx.

Okay. Now that you mention it, I can see the bruises. I hope he looks worse than you do.

Raise your hand if you were on the dance floor after Johnny Damon's homer in the fifth that put the Sox game out of reach at 9-2.

Good. I understand. Queen was playing on the jukebox and the Sox were about to win. You are excused due to extreme insoxication as long as you swear that you weren't trying to do the Macarena.

Raise your hand if you really weren't planning on staying for the Patriots-Steelers game too, but it was just too much effort to leave the bar.

Gotcha.

Raise your hand if you ordered a round of shots to celebrate Corey Dillon's first quarter touchdown run but the shots didn't arrive before the Steelers scored to tie the game 7-7.

Hmmm. You did the shots anyway though, right?

Raise your hand if an Irish Car Bomb started to sound like a good idea to "calm your nerves" of course when the score was tied at 20-20 in the fourth quarter.

Mmmm. Guinness, Jamison and Bailey's.

Raise your hand if you were still in the bar at 8pm as Adam Vinatieri's kick fluttered through the uprights with 0:01 left to give the Patriots a 23-20 victory and you threw your hands into the air in celebration and fell directly backward off your swiveling barstool and the next thing you knew it was Monday morning.

Oh. I see. No show of hands. I guess that was just me.

Go Sox! Tonight Schilling vs. Little Davey Bush

Giddy Up

It has officially started: the nailbiting and the rally nachos. I even watered the lucky plant for clutch hits (and it worked).

The Red Sox pulled off a nice clean 6-3 win last night over the lamo Orioles. Trot and Manny provided the clutch hitting. There was good starting pitching, a solid performance by the bullpen and only the mildest scare in the bottom of the 9th -- nothing that a couple of Tums couldn't take care of.

My favorite play of the game though was when Jason Varitek almost beat out a routine ground ball to the first baseman in the top of the fourth inning. Given, Tek always runs his ass off, but this was something more...a message to his teammates: "This is the way that we are going to play."

Today 4:30et/1:30pt The Emancipator vs Bedard

It's Official

It's official, the Baltimore Orioles are the lamest team in baseball.

No, it's not just because they let the Yankees roll over them this week to sweep a four game series with the American League East title on the line. The Orioles, who led the American League East themselves for the first two months of the baseball season, couldn't even muster up win for "pride" -- or at least put up a fight to wear down the Yankee pitching staff, or to force extra innings...something.

The Orioles also have the lamest player in baseball. Not only did Rafael Palmeiro test positive for steroids, but now it has come out that he has ratted out teammate Miguel Tejada. Apparently Tejada gave Palmeiro the substance that caused the positive steroid test. What did Tejada do, slip him a mickey?

And by the way, Cal Ripken Jr. is annoying too.

Let's just count our lucky stars that we're not from Baltimore and hope for the sake of the Red Sox season that the Orioles maintain their lameness for at least three more games.

Go Sox!

Hangin' Tough, Stayin' Hungry

One coveted day off for the Red Sox and then ten games in ten days for the chance at a playoff spot. I guess Dan Shaughnessy was wrong after all. (Thanks a lot Dan.)



Ten blowoutwins is just about what it will take to make the dreadful images of last night's game go away: the Rays' Johnny "don't call me Go-mes" Gomes pumping his fist after his eighth inning triple, Manny being Manny lollygagging to first base at a critical point in the game and Adam Hyzdu whiffing whilst hitting for himself with the bases loaded in the seventh inning with Jason Varitek on the bench. Ouch. We can't even blame Edgar for last night's loss.

It's time to see what the 2005 version of the Sox are made of. It's time to sip some Jack Daniels and "Cowboy Up" to start acting like "Idiots" (the good kind), or play the Rocky soundtrack continuously in the clubhouse for the next ten days straight. Whatever it takes.

A half game deficit is no reason to panic, but the Yankees have won nine out of ten and are playing their best baseball of the season. It's time for the Sox to show what they're made of -- to win or go down with a fight.

Vote for Big Papi

Red Sox fans (and everyone who has been watching Major League baseball this season) vote for Big Papi for the Hank Aaron Award for the best overall offensive performer in the American League.

Big Papi Does It Again

photo from boston.com